@музыка: Pink Floyd - Paranoid Eyes

@настроение: I'm shattered.

@темы: стихоплетение

“I wanted it to be like the ultimate anger, the ultimate passion, the ultimate orgasm. I wanted it to be like every emotion we’ve ever had. Because then it’s unconditional to the track. And love should be always unconditional.”
Roger Daltrey talking about the scream in “Love Reign O’er Me”.

Когда-то давно читала статью про The Who в Rolling Stones (хотя скорее про Таунсенда и Долтри). Какие-то зацепившие меня цитаты сохранила в телефоне в заметках, какие-то потеряла. Сейчас чистила память, а статью перечитывать и выискивать что-то еще сил совершенно нет, потому выкладываю самое полюбившееся. Статья еще и написан очень здорово, и сделана в виде диалогов интервьюера и поочередно Таунсенда и Долтри. Датируется статья концом двухтысячных, если мне не изменяет память.
Поразительно, The Who - невероятные циркачи и балагуры при поверхностном рассмотрении, но, мать их, на деле все четверо были, а те кто выжил и есть сейчас, абсолютно отчаявшиеся люди. Они порой вгоняют меня в такую муторную грусть, что проклянуть их хочется, хотя через минуту они вновь смешат меня и хохочут под ухом.



Читать избранные цитаты.Townshend
'The dream that is at the heart of the Who's work is a dream that I think Roger and I have realised,' he says. 'That dream is ... It's like the Stones at Twickenham. They're a pub band, but they're up there in front of many thousands of people, and what happens is quite extraordinary. Even though I understand they didn't play their best ever concert at Twickenham, a bunch of people I know who were there say, "It didn't matter. What matters is that we were there together." As artists, we can affect gatherings of people. People lose themselves, and in the moment of losing themselves they then find themselves. They find a commonality, an innocence, and a sense of being which, I suppose, is close to a meditative state. When they walk away from it, they look back and think something special happened.'
(...)
I would just say, "Listen, I don't know if I could ever do what I did again." I sit and look at "My Generation" and "Won't Get Fooled Again" and I think, "How can I do that again?"'
You mean, you felt you can never better that?
'Yes, it was intuitive. And being intuitive is fucking difficult.'
(...)
And I would get these regular visits from Roger saying, "I want to do this, I want to do that," and I would say, "Listen, it's over. Fuck off." Well, I wouldn't say fuck off, but "I'm not your man". Watching him pretending to be who he was ... it was all just pathetic. I had very little sympathy for him. I thought he should really go back and be a builder. A woman said to me the other day, "But he couldn't let it go." I said, "Well, why not?" "Because he was fucking gorgeous!" I said, "Is that really what it's all about?" and she said, "There aren't very many gorgeous men in the world."
(...)
He thinks of another reason he broke up the band. 'I didn't want to be in fucking pain all the time. I didn't want to be so disdainful or so intellectual or so arrogant. I didn't want to be doing interviews with people saying [moany voice] "What's it like being old, and you said you wanted to die before you got old." I remember thinking, "Are these people vegetables or something?" '

Daltrey
He told me he came through it because he had you and Rachel.
'I really love him. I do have to deal with the madness of some of his schemes. He's a technomaniac. I don't like the internet. I don't like the world he lives in. I don't think we've created a better society from the internet. Virtual relationships - I can't deal with that.'
(...)
'Well, I feel very close to him,' Daltrey says. 'But we don't have to see each other all the time. It's a different closeness, and I really treasure it for that. The Who is the energy that exists between Pete and I, and that energy is increased by doing it separately. I don't care when people say we're not getting on - it's not fucking important. All that matters is what exists onstage and in our music. In that music is our relationship, is our love. I have such a deep love and respect for him, and that goes through all of it. He forgives all my foibles, and I forgive all his, and underneath all that I love him dearly.'
(...)
Daltrey then took the photographer and his publicist and me on a little tour of his grounds in his Land Rover. We passed a woman who keeps the hawks that keep his rabbits down. We passed several fishermen by the edge of the beautiful lakes which he had made. At a fishing lodge, we paused to pick sweet plums from a tree. 'Just think,' one of us said to Daltrey, 'those lakes that you built are now going to be part of the English landscape for ever.'
'Nah,' Daltrey said. 'Nothing lasts for ever. Nothing. We're just pushing dust around.'

@музыка: The Kinks - Barbara Ann

@настроение: sleepy.

@темы: musique, The Who, delicatessen

“The reason I write

is to make something

as beautiful as you are

When I’m with you

I want to be the kind of hero

I wanted to be

when I was seven years old

a perfect man

who kills.”

Leonard Cohen. "The Reason I Write".



***
Небо черное, и океан черный, и ты сам черный.
Только пена белая, пена, и ты сам тоже белый, только ты об этом никогда не узнаешь.
Ночь все красит в черный цвет, и потому не покидает ощущение, что небо и океан это одна завеса, которая тянется от твоей макушки и черны завитком обрушивается на песок. Вот такая вот чернеющая к низу драпировка с белым, пенным кончиком.
И если ты будешь бежать навстречу этой черноте, то в конце концов упрешься во что-то непробиваемое и ты сам потонешь в это черноте. Будешь стучать прямо по завесе и звать тех, кто с другой стороны.
С другой стороны только твоя Тень/тень. А может и они обе.

***
Can you see the real me, can you, can you?


Listen or download The Who I Am The Sea for free on Pleer

Is it me? For a moment
The stars are falling.
The heat is rising
The past is calling.


Listen or download The Who Doctor Jimmy for free on Pleer

I can't sleep, and I lay, and I think
The night is hot and black as ink
Oh God, I need a drink of cool, cool rain


Listen or download The Who Love, Reign O'er Me for free on Pleer

***
Я еще напишу о нашей поездке в Вегас, но завтра утром мы уезжаем в Сан Франциско, а эти парк дней мы провели в маленьком городке в штате Калифорния - Кармель.
Так как искупаться в океане случай мне все не представлялся, я решила пойти на берег ночью. Нацепила наушники и двинулась вниз с горы - ночью океан особенно беспокоится, гребни волн нещадно обрушиваются на береговую линию, а песок невероятно холодный, точно его держали в морозилке. Я была чрезвычайно наивна, когда думала, что приду к берегу и буду там совершенно одна.
В темноте играли друг с другом в салки какие-то мальчишки, у берега сидели несколько молодых людей, компания мексиканцев даже развела костер. Видны были только тени, так что совершенно было непонятно кто как выглядит, сколько кому лет, кто белый, а кто черный, даже, кто мужчина, а кто женщина.
Я медленно раздевалась в каком-то замешательстве, сняла часы и кольца, оставила их на полотенце, светящимся белым пятном в темной ночи. Живем один раз, когда еще я буду у Тихого океана, подумала я и разделась до гола, и рысью побежала к океану.
Так исторически сложилось, что у меня паническая боязнь больших водоемов, тут и повиляло, что я в пятилетнем возрасте едва не утонула в том же Тихом океане, когда мы с семьей были в Мексике, и то, что я в детстве напоролась на какой-то острый подводный камень в Волге, и что отец разрешил мне посмотреть "Челюсти" в том же нежном возрасте, словом, и в пенной ванне мне порой бывает страшновато.
Океан напоминал пытающую сорваться с цепи собаку - он все пытался дотянуться до меня, брызжа в гневе соленой слюной, но в итоге только облизывал мне ноги, и несмотря на кажущуюся суровость, приветливо махал своим черным водяным хвостом, в который я в итоге и окунулась с головой. У самой кромки конечно же, проехавшись носом по песку, но все же.
Как говорится в моем любимом фильме Захарова, это конечно не подвиг, но что-то героическое в этом есть.
Людские тени еще двигались вокруг меня, когда я выбралась на сушу, и немного обсохнув, я неспешно направилась к гостинице.
Под светом редких фонарей деревья выглядели, точно покрытые инеем.
Я простояла под душем где-то с четверть часа - песок был везде. В волосах, в носу, в ушах, за ушами, повсюду этот песок.
Какая ночь, черт ее дери.
Не вытравишь из меня романтика, хоть кол на голове теши.



***
(Заметка написана 5-ого августа, но решила, что лучше выложить сейчас, чем никогда)

Пока гуляла на променаде Санта Моники задумалась о том, что некоторые вещи гораздо более эффектны и эффективны в роли символов, а не по своей сути. Например море-океан и подобное: если задуматься, то как вообще кусок чего-то соленого и мокрого может быть значимым для людей? Может быть даже мечтой для некоторых, вдохновением и подобным. Но, как символ - свободы, к примеру, море-океан работают гораздо лучше, и ведь если так задуматься, то многотысячные стада туристов и просто желающих отдохнуть стремятся не к этому соленому-мокрому, а к морю, как к символу спасения от рутины, проблем, серых костюмов и прочего.
А что для вас вся это солено-водяная морока?

***
Человеком в чистом виде руководит сила лишь двух слов: "Сейчас" и "Больше". Все остальное это остаточная реакция оттого, что никто вокруг не желает подчиняться нашим желанием, ибо все слишком заняты своими "Сейчас" и "Больше".

@музыка: The Who - The Rock

@настроение: I'm fine.

@темы: musique, The Who, delicatessen, Красата., Ulysses, All I can do is be me, whoever that is, Memory of a free festival, My Private Mulholland Drive, bookworm, Leonard Cohen

Для  Икар Монгольфье Райт




When I look to the West
and the night is saluting me
who is resting on its sandy chest
with the closed eyes I still see
the ocean that is waking up
and its waves are licking my feet
it's me who the ocean will gulp
though nothing will make me retreat.
Logs and debris unite in roundelay,
seaweeds are my shackles.
I guess my last refuge is this bay.
Decuman wave I can't tackle
and what I hear is the Siren sing.
It has golden hair and Lucifer face,
it is calling for me in full swing,
it has bracelets and deadly embrace,
fangs and the voice so clear
that I am falling from the cliff down
to the ground or right from the pier.
The Siren wants me to drown,
it wants me to come closer and near,
it gives no mercy and hears no plea,
it will never let me be
and never set me free.
It sings “Swim to me, my sailor!”
I reckon, I fell for it as a newborn child,
It was my only moment of emotion
when it beckoned me and smiled
and so I let it sink me in the ocean.

@музыка: Led Zeppelin - The Ocean

@настроение: wandering.

@темы: стихоплетение, Led Zeppelin

Interviewer: You sing a lot about summers and autumns.
Ray Davies: I like autumn things. I did a record called "Autumn Almanac" - I drew pictures of it and everything. After I wrote it, for a whole month I was thinking about it. I wasted a lot time, really, because I was sweeping up dead leaves and putting them in the sack. I'm susceptible to that sort of thing - to walls and flowers. You can probably get something more from a wall than a person sometimes. It's just put somewhere. It's just put somewhere. It's in line, in order, it's in line with horizon. Ah, ridiculous. What I try to do probably doesn't come out. What I've worked out what I do - I might not be right - is to do something very personal, and then suddenly I look at it, up in the air. I blow it up and look at it and then I come down again - a better man. I was in a lift in New York City and wanted to go to the 50th floor. A woman came in and wanted to go to the basement and I said I was here first, I want the 50th floor, and she said, "Sue me". Great. I accepted it...
Interviewer: Sometimes they shoot you.
Ray Davies: In England they just let you live (laughter). That's the best way to die. The deadest way... Grayness is beauty in boredom.
Interviewer: How do you go about writing?
Ray Davies: Everything has been thrown at me, paperboats float past me, but something more direct might hit me and leave its mark. I think the things I write about are the things I can't fight off. There are a lot of things I say that are really common-place. I can't get rid of them. I go into something one minute, then look at it, then go back into it.

Jonathan Cott, Rolling Stone, Nov. 10, 1969

@музыка: The Kinks - Arthur

@настроение: sleepy.

@темы: musique, The Kinks, delicatessen, Красата.

"Delusion"

The unreleased rock-opera by The Kinks written by Raymond Douglas Davies in 1976.

B-side



7. In The Front Room7. In The Front Room
Sung by Ray Davies and Chorus


Прослушать или скачать The Kinks State Of Confusion бесплатно на Простоплеер

(Chorus of The Broken Things)

Hit the bottle! Hit the bottle!

(Terry)

This evening is getting over the top.
Want to smash my head against the wall.
Outside life is going without a stop.
Being six foot why do I feel small?
I am climbing up the wall,
My circus make-up is drying up,
Lots of wine makes me crawl,
Should I pour tea in a dirty cup?
I see a spider’s web on a broom
Got a feeling of a gladiator
Sitting alone in this front room.

Hate going to the labor exchange.
I can sit there for ages
But still end up without the wage.
Haven’t I learnt all the stages?
Haven’t gone out for so long
I think my cronies forgot
That I also could be wrong.
Did they really leave me rot?
This house is as damp as a tomb
Got a feeling of a recluse
Sitting alone in this front room.

I hate this poor semi-detached.
No hot water, no spare light-bulb,
Wall-papers are dingy and wretched,
Should I air to make it easier to gulp?
Priority seats on football matches,
Extra days for returning a debt,
Free paper bags and matches?
Unemployed which benefits I get?
No one enters the house in the time womb
Got a feeling of an outcast
Sitting alone in this front room.

The toys are collecting the dust,
No children to pull of their heads,
Their bikes are covered with rust,
Maybe I should sell them instead?
My wife’s perfume is chasing me
On my clothes and pillow-cases
Smells of Dutch pastry and the sea,
Can I get rid of it in any places?
My double is hiding in the gloom
Got a feeling of a fake
Sitting alone in this front room.

At night I dream of a crumble,
In the morning of my wife’s kiss.
Too much waste on which I stumble.
Confusion that I can’t dismiss.
This phone hasn’t rung for ages,
My number can be easily found
On the telephone book’s pages,
Tired of waiting for its sound.
A photo of me dressed as a groom
Got a feeling of a widower
Sitting alone in this front room.

I’m still going nowhere fast
Mooning about my shattered ego.
I’m blinded by my brilliant past.
Now I suffer from a star fever.
I’d like to get a ball rolling
But I feel like a fish out of water.
The bells have stopped tolling,
Now my way in life is to totter.
Only tinned goods now I consume
Got a feeling of an old-timer
Sitting alone in this front room.

I’ve always been a lucky dog
So spoilt by a wide choice.
I’ve learnt to work like a dog.
And when time comes to rejoice
They want to make me repent
And to jump through the hoops
As if under a circus ten
But I won’t grant them any scoops.
Faded is my shiny clown costume
Got a feeling of an underdog
Sitting alone in this front-room.

My family has vanished,
It has left me out in the cold.
I’m a memory they banished,
They won’t cross this threshold.
This spine-chilling notion
Of having no one to rely on
Like a film in slow-motion
Where actors still have to walk on.
There is no way out, I presume
Got a feeling of a cripple
Sitting alone in this front-room.

Dreaming of wife sending a note
I honestly meant only the best,
Now I am just a useless float
With a hole inside my chest.
I know, I’ve cheated on her
With a woman I also love,
I can’t choose whom I prefer
Let this be chosen above.
No strength to wait for a doom
Got a feeling of the dead
Sitting alone in this front-room.

(Chorus of The Broken Things)

Hit the bottle! Hit the bottle!

[Terry’s wife makes a call leaving a telephone message to him]

(Recorded woman’s voice)

I am not coming back to you, don’t even beg me. And yes… daughters will stay with me, you can have a house for now… Don’t get upset, darling, please. You remember that there is a high risk of you heaving a heart-attack, don’t you? Good night, Terry.

8. Fresh Meat8. Fresh Meat
Sung by Ray Davies


Прослушать или скачать The Kinks Hot Potatoes бесплатно на Простоплеер

[Drunken Terry is meandering along the house talking about his probable plans for the future]

(Terry)

Well I'm a bad apple
Don't crave for my seeds.
I'm not your Mr. Adam
But I know what a man needs.
A Cumberland sausage
And a cask of ale,
No more a diet's hostage,
Sir, send the check by mail.
Today is my veggie day-off.
Gonna stuff myself with meat,
Best meals from a bake-off
'Till there's nothing else to eat.

Oh, yeah, I need some fresh meat,
Some juicy, grease food to eat.
On my plate I need you, sweet,
But such food is only for elite
You’re too expensive for me to eat,
Oh, yeah, then bring me dead meat.

Girl, I'll whet your appetite
And stick my finger in your pie.
I was hungry as a bear that night
Acted as if I was your guy.
Just try the forbidden fruit,
I'll eat my cake and have it too.
Before I am in the soup
I'll stay a rotten apple for you.
Let’s not waste time
I’m not yet old and stale
Now, when I’m in my prime
And you’re yet not on sale.

Oh, yeah, I need some fresh meat,
Some juicy, grease food to eat.
Try me, I’ll do it neat,
Let me teach you how to cheat.
But you’re so expensive to eat,
Oh, yeah, then bring me dead meat.

Life's such a drag
Going to work at nine
With a heavy grey bag
To damage my spine.
One of these days
I think that life on the dole
Is one of the best ways
To avoid the stress toll.
Craving for a dinner break
Clerks work hours on end
While I'm eating a fruit cake.
For me every day is a weekend.

Oh, yeah, I must try fresh meat,
Some juicy, grease food to eat
To dirty your white sheet.
You’ll enjoy my treat.
Why are you so expensive to eat?
Oh, yeah, then bring me dead meat.

Try me now, girl, ‘cause
I’m a wizard of skill.
We have a common cause
Cooking dishes of my appeal,
Giving 'em titles like baronets.
These dishes can bring us fame.
Once a novelty begets
A patent or the world acclaim
It will return me to the game.
You will bake
And I will write my name
On the crème-de-la-crème cake.

Oh, yeah, I need some fresh meat,
Some juicy, grease food to eat
To drown myself in heat
And I will feel complete.
You can’t be so expensive to eat,
Oh, yeah, then bring me dead meat.

Maybe I'll start my business,
Employ several folks,
Buy barrels of cheap Guinness.
Coconut and artichokes
Will make my place exotic.
I'll become a food king
Of North London and patriotic
Members of left-wing.
Wanna put on weight, ma'am?
How 'bout good old Shepard's pie?
Or a juicy chop of lamb
On the side try our crunchy fry?

Oh, yeah, gimme some fresh meat,
Some juicy, grease food to eat.
Girl, stop acting discreet,
There’s no one I can’t defeat.
Why are you so expensive to eat?
Oh, yeah, then bring me dead meat,
Oh, no, always too expensive to eat.
I’m so tired of this dead meet,
Can’t eat anymore this dead meat
Again I have vegetables to eat.

[Incomprehensible mumbling]

Check out my “Carrot Delight”, but first I’ll see you on your knees…
“Cucumber Heaven” cakes are worth trying for those who love to tease…
Come 'ere, take a bite, but first, say “please”.
Oh yeah, come right now, little girls, I will put you at ease…

9. Inside and Outside9. Inside and Outside
Sung by Ray Davies and Maryann Price


Прослушать или скачать The Kinks Sleepless Night бесплатно на Простоплеер

[Julie is knocking on Terry's front door, but he is too scared and uncertain to open it. They have a conversation through the closed door]

(Terry)

Ooh, every time I look inside
My head's spinning like a railroad.
Ooh, every time I come inside
It’s just me to carry this load.
And every day I hear they say
That the house is damned,
That I have to go away
But my brain is jammed
And I know no way to escape.
These locks in my head have a code
Opening them is close to a rape
And my head is about to explode.

(Julie)

Ooh, every time I look outside
By chance my eyes are looking for you.
Ooh, every time I go outside
It's you who I am searching in a queue.
All these days since our last talk
Have been such a burden to me.
I chose to shadow, I chose to stalk.
To let me in just use the key.
It's so hard to find an explanation
Why you changed me for this squalor,
I won't believe that your salvation
Is to get bored becoming a white collar.

(Terry)

Ooh, every time I look inside
I can't help myself from falling down.
Ooh, every time I come inside
I'm taking off a smile of a clown.
You even called me the joker
One of those nights I spent with you.
Now I'm a fake and you're a stalker
And I guess, there's nothing to redo.
Like the house's my insides need oiling,
The gates in the wind do squeak
From my youth I was used to spoiling
But today it's me who's weak.

(Julie)

Ooh, every time I look outside
I cry over your conscious banishment.
Ooh, every time I go outside
I note that I am a glutton for punishment.
This is your doing, surely I know,
And I can't say that I regret
This doesn't mean my profile is low
But I won't mouth an empty threat -
Life in a wicked valley of the Shadow
Didn't do good to anyone.
What's your real danger, do you know?
'Cause if you don't - just run.

(Terry)

Ooh, every time I look inside
I scream out of the total emptiness.
Ooh, every time I come inside
I am surprised by my own pettiness.
Just go away, my poor small Julie,
I am not of the same kidney,
My hands too shaky to open, truly.
I advise you to forget me freely,
We're done but haven't even started.
You still make me wild and dizzy
But it's better for us to be parted.

(Julie)

Ooh, every time I look outside
I see a strong man whom I've fancied.
Oh, every time I go outside
I find him unruly trying to be placid.
There's chance for us to start anew,
Don't want to live my life in a fantasy,
I want to bare and unfold you,
I want to keep your full sanity,
You just have to fully trust me.
But, first, open these damn doors.
There is a new world for us three -
Me and you and that Shadow of yours.

(Terry)

Ooh, every time I look inside
I see that dark figure following me.
Ooh, every time I come inside
I understand, there's no chance we will agree.
Something about the Shadow is sensual
But haven't you desired me, not it?
Or is a messy drunkard not so sexual?
This beast doesn't allow me to quit,
It's a tyrant who controls my every move
And I have no will-power to stop that.
Are you being my deadly guest the truth?
Like you he supposed to come to my flat.

(Julie)

Ooh, every time I look outside
I wonder what is on your troubled mind.
Ooh, every time I go outside
I wonder what doubts you have behind.
Yes, I was sent to you by someone,
Yes, our meeting isn't accidental.
But I still want to come for you undone.
I must ask you not to be judgmental
You're a special lover whom I'll miss
When I turn you into a shadowless wraith.
I'll be your link with the world this
Though what you do now is only rave.

(Terry)

Ooh, every time I look inside
I see a double-faced man whom I don't know.
Ooh, every time I come inside
I leave double-faced pals whom I don't know.
Are you just another trick of my mind?
Are you another Shadow's fable?
Or are you a trick of the burned-out light?
Of what else deception is that devil able?
Every precious part of my life,
I guess, was invented by my companion.
How much more of freight and strife
My Shadow is presuming to imagine?

(Terry and Julie)

Ooh, every time we look inside
We see dark figure in the corners of our minds.
Ooh, every time we look outside
We see a dark man in the mirror on our sides.
Ooh, every time we come inside
We hear someone else's words spoken in our voices.
Ooh, every time we go outside
We face a stranger who predicts all our choices.
Ooh, every time... inside and outside...
Ooh, every time... inside and outside...

10. The Imposter/Disillusioned10. The Imposter/Disillusioned
Sung by Ray Davies, Chorus, Maryann Price and Dave Davies as the Shadow


Прослушать или скачать The Kinks Flashs Confession бесплатно на Простоплеер

[Terry is confronted by his Shadow in the same front room, their dialogue looks more like a battle]

(The Shadow)

Let’s hear it for Terry, our Mr. Death of A Clown!
Let’s break his crown, bring this imposter down!

I’ve weighed you, measured you
And definitely found wanting.
To the last I’ve tightened a screw.
This house I am haunting
Will eat you up right now.
You’ve wasted my time,
I give no quarter anyhow.
Your hesitance is crime.
There is nowhere to run to,
No roof to hide under,
No door to get you through,
No visitors to plunder,
No cronies to deceive,
No ambitions to live up to,
No working place to leave,
No women to screw.
You’re a fake and a liar,
Don’t you play with fire.
You’re a nobody,
You’re a shadow of me.
You are below the standards,
You are just an imposter,
A trickster with no roster,
Yes, you are an imposter.

(Chorus of the Broken Things)

You had to get on with your life
You failed, so we’ll break you.
You had to make up with the wife
You failed, so we’ll crush you.
Your Death will come today -
Reconcile yourself and obey.
There’s no direction home,
No unknown paths to roam.
Have your last lunch and tea
But instead of toast and butter,
Jam and brew of maple tree,
Papers that provoke stutter
With forecasts, scores of baseball,
With news that predict your fate
You’ll find instead of them all
Yourself served on the plate.

(The Shadow)

You’re a loser with no creative flow
Who thought he is talented but is a flop.
You betrayed those whom you owe
So now your curtain has to finally drop.
No one in your family was ever divorced
But you have brought disgrace on it
Though your confession is forced.
You fall in with women and then you split,
All your faults you never admit,
You suck dry emotions of those who are near,
You charm people and then disappear,
If you think that you were a good man
I will reason you out of it, oh, I can.
You broke everything you touched,
Looked down on others too much,
You were pleased with yourself
Damaging psychological health
Of those who treasured you,
Your pals you tried to outdo,
Were jealous and bitter,
Treated friends like litter.
They deserve someone better
I will return a hundredfold
‘Cause I am not that go-getter
And a freak who controlled
His hidden feelings all his life.
You will be my Shadow, Terry,
My page boy, dark and scary,
‘Cause now you’re an imposter,
A trickster with no roster,
Yes, you are an imposter.

(Terry)

You can’t be serious.
Am I going crazy, tell me?
The situation became delirious.
There are only shadows I see.
My own Shadow rose in revolt,
I feel lonely and scared,
I’m not ready for an assault,
I feel completely unprepared,
I want to seek mercy and repent.
Can I be granted forgiveness?
I know no men who are sinless,
I have some unfinished business -
My wife, my children, my Julie
They need to know that I’m gone, truly.
They don’t deserve my Shadow
Taking my place with no notice.
I can already see the morning
The rising sun might save me
Should I stay inside
Or should I flee?
Is it there outside
Something worthy to hope for?
Or is it just hunger and war?
Am I a survivor or debris?
Can I build another family?
Can I find mercy and light
If I try with all my might?
Or am I just an imposter?
A trickster with no roster,
Oh, I can’t be just an imposter.

(The Shadow)

You will stay there in the cellar
With wines bottles and bottled up feelings,
With mice and mold and damp ceiling.
I’ll have my dance on a volcano
Celebrating my freedom
Drinking gin and eating Edam
Cheating on people and committing evil
Under your name and in your house
And you’ll stay silent like a mouse
And if everything goes as planned
One day you will understand
That you’re an imposter,
A trickster with no roster,
Yes, you are an imposter.
Or do you want to meet Julie?
Oh yes, she is an English rose, truly,
She is the gracious kind of Death,
She’ll come and take your last breath.
I created her in a form you would love.
Looks like your first love from above
But Julie is a fiction, she’s not real,
There’s nothing you can conceal
From me and from her.
Although you would prefer
To hate us and loath,
I know that secretly
You love us both.


Прослушать или скачать The Kinks Too Much On My Mind бесплатно на Простоплеер

[Julie appears in the front room reaching out to Terry. She looks ghostly]

(Julie)

Oh my love, there is only one truth,
I am a ghost and illusion, but listen,
For realizing it you don’t need a sleuth,
I am not the only mirage, so listen.
Everything around you doesn’t exist,
It’s just a huge mind-twist.
Me and your Shadow don’t belong here
And everything you see and hear
Is inside your poor demented mind.
Why are you numb and blind
To this vast world outside?
Inside you are suffering, my dear,
Just try to focus and think clear,
Close your eyes and open them again
And see that we’re an illusion
And a subtle trick of your brain
So there won’t be any confusion.
Let all your demons go,
Unwind and go with the flow
And let me go too.
Just know that I will always love you,
I’ll stay with you inside your mind,
There you don’t need to hide
So look on a bright side
And I’ll be by your side.
Now you are disillusioned
But isn’t it the best conclusion?

(Terry)

But if The Shadow disappears
Then you will vanish too.
I was waiting for you these years
And now I have to start anew
With no return ticket
With no guarantee of better things,
Well, that’s not cricket.
I was never tied to apron strings
But I need guidance and a guide,
I am eternally scared of the outside
And everything is ruined inside.
Now I am disillusioned
And I don’t like such a conclusion.

(Julie)

Oh my love, there's no other solution,
You are likely to self-destruct
If you don't go through an evolution.
I can guard you and conduct
But the toughest path
You have to take yourself.
The unexpectant is aftermath,
Now choose for yourself.
Your emotions pump and flood
But you can easily break me
Though I'm not of flesh and blood.
In your mind I can be totally free
In its deepness we'll meat then,
Like Vera Lynn always sings
Don't know where or when
But there we will find better things.
So end it all and pull yourself together
And crush your dark reflection
And everything will change, even the weather
And go to any preferable direction.
Close your eyes
And see the world as it is,
Accept life without lies
And face the Shadow as it is.
Don't be afraid of being disillusioned
As your life turned out to be a delusion.
Every time you'll come inside
I'll be there as we have never parted.
Every time you'll come outside
I'll give you my consent half-hearted.

(Terry and Julie)

Ooh, every time I’ll look inside
I’ll find you there by my winding side.
Ooh, every time I’ll come inside
You will be my everlasting guide.
Ooh, every time I’ll look outside
I’ll be looking for you in every corner.
Ooh, every time I’ll go outside
I’ll feel myself a timeless loner.

(The Shadow)

I don’t believe it’s happening -
My own creation broke loose
Am I bad in situation handling?
Right now I need a truce.
The sun is coming out
And I’m on the edge of fading,
Maybe we can do trading?
Why is he not degrading
Or crying out of fear?
Why don’t I see a single tear?
I lack my power and strength
Under the light’s ray length.
I am in a state of confusion
Oh, I am so disillusioned.

(Terry)

I think I've lost my fear
Of open spaces, shadows and dark.
I won't spare you another year,
I won't let you creep and lark.
You've always been the joker,
I've been joker's Knave Of Hearts.
Better call the insurance broker
'Cause now we gonna be apart
As you are no reflection of me
But just a demon who broke loose.
Looking in the mirror I will see
Not a victim of your abuse
But just myself whoever it is
And I will accept this person
Whatever or whoever it is
And my reflection won't worsen.

(Terry and Julie)

Ooh, every time I’ll look inside
I’ll be waiting for your familiar greeting.
Ooh, every time I’ll come inside
I’ll bring all I own to this meeting.
Ooh, every time I’ll look outside
I’ll be searching for your face.
Ooh, every time I’ll go outside
I’ll feel lonely in every place.
Ooh, every time I’ll look outside
There will be no more fear or confusion.
Ooh, every time I’ll come outside
I will be ready to be again disillusioned.
Ooh, every time... inside and outside...
Ooh, every time... inside and outside...

11. Someone Else11. Someone Else
Sung by Ray Davies


Прослушать или скачать The Kinks Death Of A Clown бесплатно на Простоплеер

[Terry has escaped from his house. He is sitting under the bridge of river Thames waiting for the sun to come out]

(Terry)

I’ve done a long way from home
But I hear all those ghosts singing
While I’m sitting under the bridge
Feeling drunk, but I’m not drinking.
Now The Clown Terry is dead,
I don’t know what is to be myself.
Now when there’s nothing left
I’ll go and be someone else.

There is no hand going down my throat
When I've said something bitter.
There is no jacket for me when I catch a cold
To make it warm and there’s no sitter.
There is no way I can make myself to perform
When every night the rules of the show differ.
There is no way I can stop feeling alone
Or my cold wet feet being less stiffer.
She said that she'll wait for the day
When I will not drink and come clear
But she’s left and headed down the highway
As I've never come clear.
Now there’s no cellar full of whiskey and beer,
Have I ever been clear?

Should I just close my eyes
And I’ll meet those I miss?
I have a dream that never dies
‘Bout a person I can’t dismiss
And this person is me.
He’s nameless and homeless,
You can’t touch him or see,
He’s a vagabond and homesick.
She said that she'll wait for the day
When I will not drink and come clear
But she left and headed down the highway
As I've never come clear.
Now there’s no cellar full of whiskey and beer,
Have I ever been clear?

Do I no longer exist?
Am I invisible for others?
My name is in the list of the diseased
But I can see and observe others.
Now The Clown Terry is dead,
I don’t know what is to be myself.
Now when there’s nothing left
I’ll go and be someone else.
I’ve done a long way from home
But I hear all those ghosts singing
While I’m sitting under the bridge
Feeling drunk, but I’m not drinking.
Now The Clown Terry is dead,
I don’t know what is to be myself.
Now when there’s nothing left
I’ll go and be someone else.

In an hour the Big Ben will strike six
There’ll be no time for illusions and tricks.
The Clown is dead, the Shadow’s gone
Under this bridge homeless and alone
I don't know if I'm still Terry.
There is no more past to bury,
I have no more memories to doubt
But outside I see something else.
Soon the sun will come out
And I’ll become someone else.

The album was unreleased due to the reluctance of Arista Records, the financial problems of the producer, self-plagiarism of the writer and lack of the good lead guitar player.

@музыка: listen to this music.

@настроение: and be silent.

@темы: musique, The Kinks, стихоплетение, "Delusion"

@музыка: The Who - Melancholia

@настроение: fed up.

@темы: musique, The Who, limelight, All I can do is be me, whoever that is, shoeshine

James Ensor. "Skeleton Painter in his Studio".

@музыка: The Kinks - Have A Cuppa Tea

@настроение: sleepy.

@темы: Красата., fine-artish

@музыка: The Kinks - Headmaster

@настроение: sleepy.

@темы: musique, The Kinks, стихоплетение, "Delusion"

@музыка: The Kinks - Catch Me Now I'm Falling

@настроение: reflecting.

@темы: cinematographe, delicatessen